I have done it again. I made my Mother angry on the matters of the Afterlife. I somehow got the unhealthy notion that while those who had lived long, happy lives go to a very nice Afterlife, those who had died very horribly, those who committed suicide and those who had died before they were born, either by the death of the mother or other complications, have a miserable Afterlife. I don't know why it is hard for me to imagine a soul who had been tortured then brutally murdered can suddenly be so happy that sunshine, rainbows, lollipops, fluffy kittens, fuzzy ducklings, and other assorted cute stuff come flying out of every opening on their bodies. How can a mother and her unborn child be so happy to see each other when their lives ended so badly. I mean, the mother didn't get to give birth to her baby and the baby didn't get to be born. My mind has trouble grasping this concept. What if the soul never gets born? What if the soul, every time it tries get born, dies because of events that were beyond its control? Would they go insane? Does a soul even feel sad or angry just once? Or are they all happy, happy, joy, joy all the time? Is my soul corrupted? It seems that way. Maybe I am controlled by horrible, Godless abominations who see me as nothing but a plaything and banquet. They feast on my pain and suffering with a gluttony the likes of which no one in the universe has ever seen before. How can I hope to dig out of my morass of sadness if I keep sinking back in? Why is it that the beliefs and concepts I hold dear seem so useless and trivial to a soul? It just seems like every life I have had lived, my memories, hopes, dreams, and accomplishments, are just useless things to throw away when I'm done with them. And where do all the unfulfilled wishes, dreams that never came true, and plan that never got off the ground because of untimely death go? Do they go into some sort of wastebasket of the cosmos, to be lost and forgotten forever? Are they still active, but in an another person? And where in the universe would one find the wastebasket, if it exists at all? I feel like the entire existence is in a thick fog of amnesia, forgetting what came before and after your life. Why is there a wall between this world and the Afterlife? The way I see it, it's doing more harm than good.  What I don't get is why a soul is so happy when the life it had left behind is so horrible and had ended on a tragic note? Are they so mindlessly happy that other emotions don't count? Are people who die alone truly alone? I always felt that the souls of unborn babies are angry and upset because they never got be born, live a nice, happy life, grow up, get married, have kids of their own, grow old and eventually die peacefully. I always pity the souls who never have a chance to live. I also feel sorry for the souls who were bound to this world because of what they had suffered in their lives and their deaths. I just wish I can do something instead of just sitting there and whining about it! I want to help them, to make them see that there is something better than the constant pain they were experiencing, to tell them that they don't have to suffer anymore and their loved ones are waiting patiently for them to come home, to make them understand that whatever they have suffered in life doesn't matter anymore. I want to see the smiles on their faces when they know that things are going to get better for them and everything is going to be okay. I had made myself cry when I typed the last few sentences. I wonder if it means something. Could it be that the reason it gets to me when a person's life comes to a tragic end or when a ghost is trapped on this world by his or her suffering is that deep within my subconscious I want to desperately help them, to show them that someone does care and is deeply saddened by what happened to them. On a lighter note, I am happy to know is that my Grandma is very happy where she is. I mean, she is with her family, her husband is there, and she is surrounded by cats and other animals who were very lucky to know her in life. I must be going now. I have to get this post up before 3am! On the plus side, I do feel better typing it all out. Maybe all those negative emotions that have been building up for the past few days have finally got to me and I have to let it all out. I am sorry Mom for the emotional outbursts you have to put up for the past few days. I wish I can make it up to you.

I'll second that - there's nothing wrong with you.

I can see why you would have a hard time imagining a deeply unhappy soul becoming all sweetness and light after dying, but that doesn't mean that they'll stay miserable.  I believe, personally, that such a soul will find after death a haven where they might not be miserable, and then as they adjust to a lack of misery, they may become happy again.  It makes sense that as we may adapt to happiness, so must our souls.  Souls may even find happiness in leaving sorrow behind, because among the dead, and their own loved ones who went before, and only time waiting to reunite them with those behind, there is no need for sorrow.

As for those not born, perhaps they do feel a lttle sad, or angry, or even a little relieved - it may be as daunting to be born as many big choices in life are.  But I believe that if they don't get born once, they will a second time, so they don't really miss out on life altogether.  Although it would be annoying if it keeps happening, but I'm not sure it would be as terrible as all that.

As for the forgotten and lost dreams, hopes, and wishes, I think they probably go to the afterlife as well, to wait so that when a soul returns, they might pick them up and live them out as they were unable to do in life.

And the souls that linger on earth, I think their suffering ends when they can let go of their pain, and when they are able to do so they can move on to what comes next.  It is a tragedy that they are present, but it is not forever.  And once they move on, they can find contentment in their souls and be happy.  I, too, always wish I could do something to help, but people can only be helped if they will accept it.

I'm glad typing it all out made you feel better, though.
I hope some of this might help, too.