Veridian Etoile wrote on Sep 30
th, 2012 at 7:50pm:
J showing him that the "old ways" are going to be a thing of the past will help that too. Hopefully over time, your son will come to at least respect J and be nice to him, and who knows, he may even start to like him again when J changes for the better.
As for the families, being as subtle as a nuclear bomb may do it. Sometimes you have to bring out the big guns and I'm glad to see you're prepared to do that! They wouldn't like it if someone interfered in their relationships, so it's only right that they don't interfere in anyone else's, notably yours in this case.
Maybe there is something ultra special, once in a lifetime kind of thing between you two... Only you two know for sure and you can't make that shine in its full glory with people sticking their noses in, that's for sure!!
And J is going to get hit with the nuclear bomb, too.
He's going to realize just how strong he made me by putting me through all of this. And maybe he won't like it, and he'll hit the road. But I think he will like it. A whole lot.
Over and over, he's told me that I need to stand up to him more, and stop letting him walk all over me. And I haven't been able to overcome my anxiety to do so. Until now.
Now, I know I have to overcome it, or I lose the bliss.
My whole life, I've been plagued by a deep and persistent depression. I'd rarely ever experienced true happiness. Even the happy moments were tinged with a bit of sadness.
I love my son, but his birth was tinged by the sadness of being abandoned by his father, and knowing that my family didn't approve of me having him.
My first marriage, I remember walking down the aisle with a forced smile, thinking, "Run, run, run, run, run."
But J? When it's good, it's bliss. Pure bliss. Pure and total happiness. Happiness that, for the first time in my life, wasn't tinged by sadness.
But the bipolar poisons that, and that's why we had to go through this. Because it made him realize that he MUST get it under control. Period. And with that realization, and all of the realizations that I've had in the last couple of weeks, we can finally fight to have that bliss more and more and more.